venerdì 30 dicembre 2011

Ultime news dal pianeta Vilnius

Hi to everyone. It's kinda hard to write about myself, my feelings, my perceptions now that everything is coming to a sad sad sad end.
And, sorry for saying that, I really don't feel like wanting to share my emotions. Oh no, you're wrong, it's not because they are too sad. No. It's because I'm lazy. Yes. At last I reached the limit.
Stop with introspections, stop with self analyses, stop with fake convinctions and unbearable confessions.
Here I just paste an email I sent to a dear Lithuanian friend and my last status on Fb.
Have fun my readers, hope you're not angry with your poor me.

Mail
I was GLAD to see my family but I wasn't HAPPY. Here I found the perfect life-style, the one that belongs to me. And ok, I love my family but it's hard to feel good in an environment that doesn't give you what you need and, maybe, what you deserve.
It has been a very normal christmas (ah, merry christmas!), I was happy to meet my very old granmas but, finally, I wasn't excited to be at home.

Then, the 27th in the evening I found out that I booked the flight back to Vilnius for the 30th of January and not of December so I had to book another one. Well, I spent more money but it was quite cheap and now I'm in my lovely room in Sevcenkos gatve.

I feel like I'm walking on a wire suspended between two worlds and if I fall I can feel serious pain.
I must learn how to accept the end of all of this and maybe now it hurts a bit more than what I expected because I went back to Italy and I'm here for just a few days. It's like a sweet sweet punishment.

When I decided to come here, almost a year ago, I knew Vilnius was the right place for me. I don't know why but I could feel that to study here was for me the right stuff to do.
But i couldn't imagine to love vilnius so much, to live such a perfect experience.

Status
Landing in Vilnius, feel the heart beats faster and exclaim to a friend, "Come on, we're at home!" [...] Walk along the corridor of Gile, cross the threshold of the room 341 and think "fuck, at last i'm where I belong." [...] Realize that in three days all this will be the dream and the reality of someone else.
And instead of Sevcenkos gatve 16 I'll be in Via Torreggiani 22.

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